Here’s why should you stop comparing your child with others? #BeBetterThanYourself

There is a mad rat race going on in India – almost every child in India is asked to compete with classmates, friends, cousins, so far as marks and scores and grades are concerned. Kids just slog to be in the toppers list. And, if by any chance (God forbid)the scores are not ‘acceptable’, they are exposed to all kinds of censures, worst of all parental ones. Sad but this is the true depiction of a lot of Indian home out there.

Parental expectations are increasing by every passing day and the pressure of besting the neighbor child’s success is sadly leading to depression, anxiety and, often, burnouts. That great hope of yours is just getting ready to be lost forever in the crowd, Mr./Mrs. parent. And the fault lies with you, period!

In this context here is a fresh thinking – let the child compete with himself/herself. Let them be better than themselves, as nicely depicted by the Classmate notebook brand in this new video campaign #BeBetterThanYourself

Let them grow internally, let them improve themselves every day. Rather than looking outward, encourage them to win a small battle with themselves every day. And pretty soon you will have your ward achieving what you have never even imagined.

In its new marketing campaign, brand Classmate takes on the theme “Be Better Than Yourself.” The communication is conceived to challenge long-standing and widely held assumptions on the nature of “competition”.

“Whatever your passion is, keep doing it. Don’t waste time chasing after success or comparing yourself to others. Every flower blooms at a different pace. Excel at doing what your passion is and only focus on perfecting it. Eventually, people will see what you are great at doing, and if you are truly great, success will come chasing after you.”
― Suzy Kassem

Why should you stop comparing your child with others?

The motto behind comparison is to increase competitiveness amongst children. To some extent it works and even necessary. But where do you draw the line?

Remember no two children are same, even twins have different personalities. Everyone has different interests, skills, and talents. In the same vein, the level of performance also varies from person to person. Encouraging competing with others and then making them feel bad for adverse performance can evaporate kids’ self-esteem and confidence faster than you can say ‘Sharma jikaladka’

Negative Effects of Comparing Your Child:

1) Adds to Stress: The continuous pressure of competition increases stress level and ultimately to depression symptoms like insomnia, anxiety etc.

2) Lowers self-esteem: Child will become isolated and will tend to give up early

3) Suppress Talents: If their skills are overlooked and considered useless, they will stop doing it.

4) Distances from parents: The gap will become distance and distance becomes chasm if parents keep at nagging their kids basis their peers grades.

Why should you stop comparing your child with others?

How to encourage your child to chase his or her future self:

Encouraging your child to look inward rather than outward to better themselves is perhaps the best gift you can give to your child. This brings me back to the Classmate video and the thought behind it. Here is a summation of what the narrative stands for:

Admittedly, it is a concept born from a societal truth.

Children, through school and college, are almost always compared with others – their classmates and peers. And in an achievement-oriented society like ours, they are conditioned to perceive “others” as competition.

“Be Better Than Yourself” kicks off a crusade against such a prevailing view, and how it shapes the kids as they grow up. The campaign is designed to encourage the consumer to chase his or her future self. To set only their personal values and ambitions ahead of them. And to be judged only on their own metrics, not anyone else’s.

It reminds the consumer that the rise to the top is a battle against oneself, and a journey with others. In this regard, it is much more than a marketing campaign. It is a social drive.

Motivate your child to set personal goals and sit with them to chalk down the path to achieve them. Judge them only on their own performance over a period of time and don’t compare with others. The battle is against oneself and others are companions in this journey.

In many ways this video is start of a social drive. It revolves around thought-shifting and culture-changing exercise aimed at moving perceptions on both education, and its real purpose. It strives to instill the thought of besting oneself, by every passing day, with every passing effort.

Remember, no one is perfect on this earth. Everyone is unique in their own way. The destiny has different life challenges, achievement in store for everyone. And if parents motivate the child to “BE BETTER THAN YOURSELF” nothing can stop them.

 


Disclosure: Sponsored*. The views shared are solely Author only. The author doesn’t claim to be a counseling expert. 

DISCLAIMER: The content in this post is purely meant for educational purpose only and not to be substituted for professional advice.

Dr Bushra

Gynaecologist by profession~~Food ,Health,lifestyle,Freelance Blogger~~social media influencer~~writer at heart~~Email for collaboration

47 thoughts on “Here’s why should you stop comparing your child with others? #BeBetterThanYourself

  • April 20, 2018 at 12:08 am
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    Great post, and I agreed with each point..indeed each child is unique and so their talent too and as a parent we should try to avoid to be a part of this “rate race”. great initiative “Be better than yourself”, and if we adopt this mantra for ourselves and our children..life would be more pleasant and happy. thanks a lot for sharing this awesome thoughts with us!

    Reply
  • April 20, 2018 at 10:53 am
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    Must needed one in our society where there is so much of Parental & Peer pressure to perform , We forget that everyone can’t be a topper and it is more important to make our child happy & confident than putting pressure on them to be a topper .
    #Superbloggerchallenge2018

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  • April 20, 2018 at 11:40 am
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    Well It’s always a interesting topic for me when it comes about a child…i have read several similar things several times… The thing you mentioned that yes we need to compare but up to which level is not clear…we as a parents sometimes forget to draw that line, although realize soon that the line has been crossed..Everyone know about temperament of these days children..they even themselves are more concerned about their Grades and the completion around them.. My son reads our expression after showing his test notebook expecting a big praise if scored well.. And comes with face down even if half-mark is cut.. Although I always try not to over react on his performance but he expects proper reaction..

    So what to say actually no perfect parent and no perfect child😁😁

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  • April 20, 2018 at 3:34 pm
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    None of us like to be compared. So if kids are continuously compared with others, they can loose their self esteem. It is important for parents to understand that in the course of doing good, they might end up impacting negatively.
    #superbloggerchallenge2018 #instacuppa

    Reply
  • April 20, 2018 at 5:47 pm
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    A wonderful post. Can’t stop myself sharing it.
    I feel these talent shows on television are also somewhat responsible as they make the other parents wanting mire their kids.

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  • April 20, 2018 at 6:59 pm
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    Question is why do we compare in the first place? Is it just a wish to see our kid at the top or it is a want to show our kid is at the top! If we think with a quiet mind mostly it is the social pressure! What will people say when they’ll come to know my kid is not good enough? (in their standards).
    Once we stop caring for what people will say and concentrate more on what I can do to help my kid to set achievable goals and reach them! Things will change. Not everyone is born to be Einstein? It’s fine.
    Moreover, the kids DNA hasn’t come from supernatural entities; first let us look at ourselves and then set expectations!
    Happy parenting. 😃

    Reply
  • April 20, 2018 at 7:16 pm
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    Comparison not only keeps you down but also lowers your self esteem and develops a feeling of inferiority complex. I wish parents stop doing it immediately and treat their kids as an individual with his /her own capabilities, choices and talents #Superbloggerchallenge #Instacuupa

    Reply
  • Pingback:Takeaway from Super Blogger Challenge 2018 - All About The Woman

  • April 20, 2018 at 10:48 pm
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    Great post . It is 100 percent proven fact that each child has unique talent. Let that talent come out . There is just no need to compare , let the child be

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  • April 21, 2018 at 12:30 am
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    that’s a good campaign. Instead of competing with other children, if every kids will be better than how he was earlier, it would be great.

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  • April 22, 2018 at 1:27 am
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    You know at times I lose my cool because my child is often compared to my nephew by others. And I at times do the same. It is a brash confession but your post is such that it made me come face to face with the fact.

    Reply
  • April 22, 2018 at 11:28 am
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    This is such a brilliant post, every parent must read it and understand the gravity of this situation. Kudos to classmate for taking this initiative #BeBetterThanYourself to bring in the small change in the mindset of parents. A healthy competition is always good but when it becomes a pressure it takes away the fun from learning and growing up. Loved reading this post.

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  • April 22, 2018 at 11:37 am
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    Very great post shared. We should never Compare our kids with others ! As child is unique !

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  • April 22, 2018 at 4:02 pm
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    That was such a great read…so important it is for all parents to understand the need to stop comparing their child with others.

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  • April 22, 2018 at 5:59 pm
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    I totally agree with the feeling. Children are so delicate. They get hurt when compared by their parents. Competition should be to better yourself in your own terms and not with others

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  • April 22, 2018 at 8:00 pm
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    Great post and the harsh reality we all moms need to stop right now! Every child is unique and has his/her potential which is different from other child. Comparison only brings negativity in a child.

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  • April 22, 2018 at 9:35 pm
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    I totally agree. One of the biggest mistakes one can make is this and we often do it subconsciously too. It is ingrained within us across generations.

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  • April 22, 2018 at 10:15 pm
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    Comparison helps no one .Loved your insight into the topic.#Bebetterthanyourself is a social need.

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  • April 22, 2018 at 11:28 pm
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    Such an important read for parents
    . Much needed to remind people each child is unique.

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  • April 23, 2018 at 12:46 am
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    It’s obnoxious to compare kids but sadly all moms are guilty! But let’s hope we can get better!

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  • April 23, 2018 at 8:32 am
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    Every child is unique. Why make childhood a rat race. Let them bloom and learn their strengths. No comparison has ever made any child happier or better. As parents one must teach our children to learn not to run a race to outsmart other children. Well written. Kudos.

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  • April 23, 2018 at 9:16 am
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    Comparison. With other children does not benefit your child in any shape or form. It could affect them negatively and impact motivation or performance. Great write up Dr Bushra

    Reply
  • April 23, 2018 at 10:15 am
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    Only when people realise that getting good marks is not the end of the world, will this bad practice of comparing and making the child feel bad will stop. Yes, good academic performance is necessary but there are so many people who have achieved great successes in life despite failures in beginning of life.

    Reply
  • April 23, 2018 at 3:17 pm
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    nice post, children are to be moulded with great care and now a days stress of performance and competition is too much of burden. so care has to be taken. #superbloggerchallenge2018 #instacuppa

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  • April 23, 2018 at 10:17 pm
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    Nice post. Children should be motivated to know their abilities and improve them but they should not be burdened and stressed with the abilities and expectations of others.

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  • April 24, 2018 at 6:32 pm
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    This is the need of the hour! I have seen so many parents compare and not focus on what’s good in their child.

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  • April 25, 2018 at 5:24 pm
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    Wonderful post and I am totally agree with this point of view that we should not compare our children from others, instead of this we should find their abilities in them. Comparing them means showing our weakness that we are unable to find our children’s capabilities or can’t able nourish his/her abilities.

    Reply
  • April 26, 2018 at 5:34 pm
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    I totally agree with it just because I have undergone the same when I was a kid! And now I take utmost care not to compare my kids with others!! #superbloggerchallenge2018 #instacuppa

    Reply
  • April 26, 2018 at 8:16 pm
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    Wonderful post and I agree with all the points. At some point in life we all would have faced comparision as a child and that brings down morale. Time we stop comparing our kids.

    Reply
  • April 26, 2018 at 10:47 pm
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    Totally agree with mad rat race and comparisons create differences between the child and parents. Yes, everyone has its own journey and one should not be compared with other himself or herself.

    #SuperBloggerChallenge2018

    Reply
  • April 26, 2018 at 11:34 pm
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    Very well written. Everything you wrote is on point. The confinements imposed by the parents on their kids these days to ensure “good grades” is what inhibits the overall growth of the child. There is too much stress on bagging positions in class rather than actual learning.

    Reply
  • May 2, 2018 at 1:21 pm
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    Really helpful post.Parents these days r under pressure n in turn transfers d same to their wards. Compition is good but only when it is healthy n fair.
    Nice write up. Keep writing. 👍

    Reply
  • October 25, 2018 at 7:24 am
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    I really agree that we should never compare kids as every child is born with different and unique qualities….

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  • October 25, 2018 at 12:20 pm
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    It is such an insightful post. Parenting expectations and peer pressure leads a lot of pressure on the tiny shoulders. We as a parent have to understand our baby and stop judging what others or their baby is doing

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  • October 25, 2018 at 3:14 pm
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    This is such a beautiful post. Yes, most of the times parents compare their kids with others and it often leads to depression or anxiety in kids. Lowers the self esteem even. If this post reaches millions so many kids will be happy and will strive to do better thsm themselves.

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  • October 25, 2018 at 5:06 pm
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    Amazing and beautiful post. Be Better than yourself is the best challenge. Parental expectations towards kids are increasing as per the level of competition. Great thoughts.

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  • October 25, 2018 at 5:38 pm
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    seriously, this rat race make our kids feel so low and even take them to depression. sometime I feel parents kill the innocence of a kid when they compare with others

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  • October 25, 2018 at 5:42 pm
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    I hate when people compare their children with others..every child is special and unique. .just love kids as they are and inspire them to be a better human being

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  • October 25, 2018 at 7:07 pm
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    Fantastic post so well written. EACH child is different and must not be compared to others. This affects self esteem and.comfidence in later in life

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  • October 25, 2018 at 7:16 pm
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    Brilliant post. Every child has its own strengths and its best to nurture the child basis their inner qualities instead of comparing with others.

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  • October 25, 2018 at 10:03 pm
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    This is the only thing I feel I would like to teach my son and I think in someway he will also take this trait from me. Great post indeed.

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  • October 25, 2018 at 11:33 pm
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    Absolutely agree with you every child is unique and is an individual and should be treated as such. Parents and I think society in general, needs to stop this habit of comparing one child with another and then trying to push a child into something.

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  • October 25, 2018 at 11:46 pm
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    This is such an alarming post. One must know the cons of comparing which leads to fatal consequences.

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  • October 25, 2018 at 11:50 pm
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    This is such an informative post for all parents. Even my parents need to read that they should stop comparing my brother to us sisters and our cousins. He is always under stress and pressure which might be impacting his mind negatively :(. Thanks for the enlightenment.

    Reply
  • October 26, 2018 at 12:05 am
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    Very nice article on children studies. U r right. Education is not a race. Every child is special and have his own calibre to perform

    Reply
  • October 26, 2018 at 12:21 am
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    I can say that, there is a rat race or competition between the parents rather than between classmates. As a parent, I was pressured by even my daughter school’s teachers. I have to answer them why my daughter can’t write cursive letter property. As a result , we pressurized her at home. I really feel bad about such education system .

    Reply
  • October 26, 2018 at 8:14 am
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    I totally agree each and every point… All children are not same .. So happy and make them happy too. Very nice post

    Reply

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